God, I’ve missed you. I’ve missed the way you made me feel, the way that no topic was off limits during our chats. I’ve missed how random you were, but how focused you could be on my emotions or my issues. I’ve missed how much you trusted me, how much you loved me, all of the pretty things you said. I’ve missed you, and I’m happy you’re back, but I’m so afraid- afraid that you’ll make me feel the way I felt in October of 2010 again, afraid that I’ll fall back in love with you, afraid that this fine balance I’ve worked hard to gain will all go to shit if I let you back in.
You frighten me beyond reason.
